Diary room

[zach]

Day one

I applied to this game, thinking I was prepared for the worst. 5 minutes into the game, I realize how awkward I can be. I like to think I'm good with people, but it's really weird trying to hold a conversation, I mean these people came to play, they have dozens of reasons to be fake and sometimes it all feels very disingenuous. The main reason you're being nice is because you want to stay safe. There's 8 people online, they won't respond you and you don't really know whether they are busy or having a better time with another person.
I'm currently satisfied with my tribe, but things change very quickly in this game. If anyone is looking for a winner pick, I think that Aubry is the one to watch. She's fun, she seems very versatile and I think that she came to play the game. She brought up game-talk, she implied that she wouldn't mind seeing Jefra leave (which I'm not buying honestly). I think that she could be a very valuable ally, but I don't know whether I can fully trust her, she just seems so game savvy and self-aware. I like Andrea, and she wanted to make an alliance with myself and Aubry. I feel like it might be a little too early to start a minority alliance though, especially since we still haven't had the chance to talk with Sarah, Locky or the other remaining person. Grant seemed very unapproachable and was pushing the narrative where he's some kind of passionate writer, he didn't make a good impression on me and I'm pretty sure that the feeling is mutual. I need more time to get to know Jefra - Aubry allegedly doesn't like her, and if that's the case, she could easily be the first boot. Not sure how I feel about Hayden, he seemed quirky, but I can't tell whether it was his genuine personality or him trying to be a character. That's it for now. I can't wait to hear from Alicia, Locky and Sarah. For now I'm going to cross my fingers and hope that our tribe is strong at the challenges, that would be a dream come true.

[zach]

I think I might've missed my opportunity to get myself into an alliance. I felt like everything was heading into right direction, but Aubry's attitude has changed, it does make me feel like an alliance might've been created. I went offline for 3 hours and it really shows how quickly things can change. I like Alicia. It seems like people like Hayden, but I find him difficult to get along with. It wasn't a successful day one.

[estelle]

Everyday is a new opportunity to have a successful day, go get 'em tiger!!

[zach]

May 30, 2020 2:18:14 GMT -5 estelle said:

Everyday is a new opportunity to have a successful day, go get 'em tiger!!

Thanks 

[zach]

Day two

Alicia replies to me with a green circle emoji... LAME.

[zach]

I found an idol key, shared it with Locky, Aubry and Andrea. I shouldn't have told Aubry that I shared it with Locky. It was a very dumb decision on my part, but I don't want to keep any secrets from Aubry and Andrea. 

[zach]

I've decided to share all of my keys with Aubry and Andrea. I like Locky better but I'd like to stay loyal to my alliance. Andrea and Locky shared their keys with me.

Keys:
E
E
_
H
D

[zach]

Day three

I don't want an idol anyway. Whatever.

[zach]

I believe that Host Chey sent me these DMs by accident. I'm still waiting on her reply.

[zach]

So, I found all of the keys, shared them with my alliance, was inches away from winning an idol and then I screwed it all up within seconds. The moment I saw the cryptogram, I knew that I wouldn't be able to do it. I panicked and told Aubry that I got disqualified or something, no idea what I was thinking, but I was too embarrassed to admit I wasn't smart enough to finish the challenge. Now it's too late to backtrack and it's all a really awful situation - I lied to my allies, I embarrassed myself, I spent hours trying to get that idol, only to screw up. I'm going to try to rebuild my relationship with Aubry and Andrea, but the damage is done and all I can do is pick up the pieces.

[zach]

Day four

Aubry told me that she didn't find the idol, but I think that she might've gotten it. 1 She's playing really hard, helping her might've not been the greatest idea, but it's good having her somehow on my side. 2 I think she's paranoid and should relax. 3 I find Andrea much more genuine at this point. 4 Aubry, Andrea and Grant made a Final Three deal, Andrea told me about it, Aubry just said that Andrea and Grant are close. 5 Jefra talks like a teen, but she's really good at challenges, I might consider talking game with her. 6 I like Sarah, but I don't trust her, I think that her and Aubry might be secretly working together, since they're both really social and full of sh*t. 7 Grant is not a threat, but I should start strategizing with him. 8 I like Alicia, but she's barely on. 9 I asked Aubry to make a F6 that consists of myself, Aubry, Andrea, Grant, Locky and Alicia. 10 The main premise is trying to flush an idol, which Hayden, Sarah or Jefra might have. 11 It was a reckless plan and might never materialize, but I want to cover all the bases. 12 I'm hopeful that Aubry won't sell me out. 13 I keep talking game with her, and it's not a good idea to give someone that good ammo, but it might help me in the long run. 14

diva  boog  christine ed  estelle  jackie  Shadow  help me improve my confessional.

[kevin]

[jackie]

I don't like cryptograms either

[zach]

There's so many things happening in the world right now. It does distract you from the game.

Here are my thoughts on my tribemates. I've made zero progress on Grant in 4 days, it's time for me to work my magic. I get the feeling that Sarah knows I'm not feeling her game-wise? Alicia is an inactive. I could beat Locky at FTC, but let's not get ahead of ourselves. I'm not vibing with Hayden. I think Jefra could be an easy boot, lots of rumors going on around her. I already talk game with 50% of the tribe, but I don't want to play too hard. I can't tell whether branching out is a good idea. If we lost, I could imagine Andrea and Aubry telling me that my name has come up, but I don't think either of them would fight for me to stay.

[zach]

My social game isn't cutting it today, lots of awkward silences. Staying quiet seems like a good idea, but I need to do some damage control. I missed the challenge, and it did make me question my competence. Aubry and Hayden both thought that our entire team sucked at the challenge, but I think that Alicia was the sole loser of the week. I don't really know what happened, but apparently she made some inappropriate jokes? From what I heard she said Sarah sucked at the challenge and she also called Hayden gay. Don't know what exactly went down, but people are not impressed. Writing this confessional down, I honestly feel bad for Jefra. I've been telling her about all of my frustrations since day one, and everyone just keeps constantly shitting on her. Andrea thinks that she might be some kind of mastermind, because of how good she is at the challenges, and it is a possibility, but I really want to give Jefra the benefit of the doubt. If we lose, Alicia should be the boot, but people don't appear to trust Jefra. I'm praying that we win the challenge, I feel like I focused all of my energy on three people, and it's a 9 person tribe. I should've been trying my hardest everyday, but instead I focused on people, I'd naturally gravitate towards. Here are my thoughts on my tribemates.


I liked Alicia from day one, but she rubbed Andrea, Aubry, Grant and Locky up the wrong way. Someone called her annoying, someone called her borderline inactive and now people are offended by the comments she's made. I wanted to work with her, but I'm pretty sure that she didn't make enough friends to make it through the first tribal council. I think there's a slim possibility she's got an idol, so I'm going to push on splitting the vote. There's something really fun and genuine about her, but we haven't talked enough to build any sort of trust. I got the feeling that her and Hayden might be getting along? They're both online, won't respond to any of my DMs, Hayden won't talk crap about her. I think something's happening between those two.


My ally from day one. I do find Andrea a little bit awkward, I don't consider her a huge social threat, but I still think that she's really cool. Some people are so overly nice and positive, you can't help but call BS on their behavior. I think that Andrea is one of the most genuine people, she's been giving me so much intel and I think that we have a good bond. She's a good strategist, but it's been a while since we talked on personal level, so it's something I need to work on. I think she's going to make it to the merge, and don't get me wrong, she's great and all, but I just don't recognize her as a great player. 


Another one of my allies. I do find Aubry really fun, and she's also hands down, the best player on this tribe. I think that she's really intelligent, but also a bit paranoid? I've been trying really hard to build trust with her, but I got the feeling that whatever info I give her - is going end up being spread everywhere instantly. I want to fully trust her, but there's something phony about social players. I feel like feeding her info is a good idea. I mean, the more trust you show people, the more likely they are to trust you back. I think that she's going to make it deep, but she's also going to trap herself in her personal web of lies, get called out and I don't think she'd recover from that.


This guy made no effort to try and build any sort of relationship with me. I felt rejected multiple times, I really wanna be friends, I want to talk game, but it felt like he didn't care. Aubry and Andrea thought he was bossy, they have some kind of F3 deal, hopefully we are aligned by association, but he's so cold. Locky also doesn't like him. I doubt he's going to make it far, and he's not going to win with this sort of attitude.


Talking with him is like pulling teeth. Grant doesn't take initiative, but Hayden is the one person, that actively makes me feel like he doesn't want anything to do with me. It's really frustrating, I honestly try my hardest and I get nothing in return. I could see him making it far, but I don't feel appreciated by him.


Like I said before, I've been whining to Jefra since the very first day. I have some really strong opinions, that I wanted to share, and she just happened to be the person, who got bombed with all of the conspiracy theories. I don't think anyone trusts her, and it makes me want to reach out to her. People seem to think that she's some kind of mastermind, and I'm not so sure about that. I think she's smarter than she lets on. I think she's got the potential to win, but who knows?


I have a soft spot for Locky. We probably talked for 40 hours already, and we're on day six? I think that we have very different personalities, but we also have lots of things in common. Game-wise, I should've focused my energy on the rest of the tribe, I think that I secured his vote ages ago, and it only can go downhill from here on out. I gave him all of my keys, I shared all of my intel, and then he tells me that he trusts me 50%. It really does feel like we peaked already, it sucks. 


Currently, I really don't like her. She came across as very disingenuous. If she does win, it's going to be the worst season ever.